being a student

Here's what I thought could be a good Bumper Sticker for today: Approach life as a student, not as an expert.

Ok, so what the heck do I mean?

That if we approach life with the innocence, exuberance and curiosity of a student, no matter what the situation, we'll be better off.

Can we ever be "expert" at anything. Well, sure. But it's all relative, right? A yoga teacher who has practicied for decades would likely consider himself a student of yoga. I consider myself a student of the psyche, and I've been studying and working in the field of psychology for over 2 decades. I know many doctors that consider themselves students of the medical arts, despite having practiced for eons.

What's the point of seeing ourselves as students? It keeps us open to new ways of seeing things, open to learning new things, open to adapting the way we work. So often (especially for those humans disposed towards perfectionism....) being "an expert" becomes rigid, it becomes pressurized where we feel we "have to know everything" and "can't risk not being perfect" and all that mess...

Students get to have the flexibility to try things, to ask questions, to collect information. It's SO much more fun and more effective.

Right now I'm going to be a student of the sleeping type! Because being a student all day is both a fun and tiring project :)

Comments

[PTC]

I think of myself more like a cat...very curious. :) I guess that can be like a student too. I want to know everything. I need to know everything.

[Traci]

Oh, Johanna, I am ALL ABOUT being a student of sleep :) WIth less than four hours of sleep every weeknight, "sleep-in Saturday"'s are amazing!!!

My therapist and I have been talking about how I am a "good student" and that going into treatment could be like an "internship" for me where I can learn new things and succeed because of my motivation to do my best and succeed.

As a teacher for seven years now, I definitely agree that I will always be a student of teaching and being an educator. Every year my students teach me something new about how to understand them as people, how to help them in math, how to make connections, etc. That is one of my favorite things about teaching actually!

[Laura R]

I like researching and learning and finding things out. The place where I get most caught in the "can't risk not being perfect" is at work. I think it's because it's a competitive environment and I feel like I'm being judged and I'm afraid of making mistakes or disappointing people. People say things like, "this is a learning organization" and "there's always room for improvement" but with a judging tone or at least that is how I perceive it. I was telling my T today that I wish I didn't care so much what people think because it gets in the way of me doing what I know to do.

[leanonme]

an expert i am not. i guess we all go through life continually learning. Some lessons easier than others.
I like this post though. It well help me be aware of the lessons i learn in a day, week, year, lifetime. We all are learning day by day. I wish i could be an exspert at it all, i think that is a big exspectation. I will for now be grateful for the lessons i do learn. I will also try to move thru life with more abandon like a child . Life is an adventure to be sure. Much more than i had in store but i will give it my best shot.

[wendy]

I love the bumper sticker...perfectionism is a persistent battle. I have a lot of natural curiosity...love hearning...but, still have to fight the urge to assume a perfectionistic tendency to assume responsibility to make relationships work. about making relationships work and viewing how well I am doing with ED.

[Laura R]

Wendy - that is EXACTLY what I'm struggling with right now! This life long tendency (feels like a mission) I have to "assume responsibility to make relationships work" fails me when the other person doesn't cooperate regardless of what I do. I make myself the one to blame by default because I'm not perfect and couldn't make it work. I'm in the middle of a situation at work right now. Being disappointed in myself for not being able to make it work totally feeds into the ED stuff. At the same time, standing up for myself and letting the other person be all nutty about it feels dangerous. Thanks for writing about it...I'm not alone :)

[wendy]

I know that feeling of disappointment well...sometimes I can actually be content with just doing my best to be at peace with others. I do think some of it is not assuming responsibility for other's emotions and reactions to life and recognizing I don't always understand how others perceive things because they perceive them thorugh their pasts.