another this week's Bumper Sticker...

This week's Bumper Sticker, brought to us by Laura: Sappy is Good.

I don't know where sappy got a bad rap along the way...

Too often we get inhibited about expressing our emotions. We all know the "difficult" emotions (like anger, sadness, resentment...) can be a challenge to express (and experience :). The emotions thought of as "good" or "positive" can be just a challenge to express.

Particularly in American and closely related cultures, expressing things like gratitude, love, thankfulness... these somehow get seen as "sappy" and therefore as "not good" or something to be embarrassed about.

It doesn't make sense to me. I think all those "sappy" things are way cool. I mean, how lucky are we that we're hard-wired to feel those? And what a joy that we get to encounter them in our lives.

I vote that when we come across a "sappy" feeling, like Laura did today, we shout it from the rooftops (ok, maybe that's a little extreme... but you get the idea :)

Comments

[Laura]

Good point, Johanna. And you're right, "sappy" having a bad rap makes absolutely no sense!

[leanonme]

" SOMETIMES MY HEART IS SO FULL I THINK IT MIGHT EXPLODE" If only there were someone I could tell.

[Pauses4paws]

I've always been sappy, somewhere inside, but somehow it seemed like an innappropriate way to express myself. It was as if it was just too much and would overwhelm people if they knew how sappy I really was about certain things. As ED recovers, my sappy side feels a little more free to roam these days--and I like it! ;)

[wendy]

Yeah...I like Sappy is Good! I used to get as uncomfortable in sappy feelings as I did in the more uncomfortable ones like anger and anxiety and saddness cause they felt dangerous and vulnerable...now it isn't so bad. It is funny that as women, especially ones who struggle with eating disorders that we can feel like we are too much and yet not enough at the same time. To me to feel is to be alive. :)

[Super Egg]

very cool.

[Ann]

My best friend calls the sappy inside = Gooey. I am gooey and there's a lot of times when I like to be gooey, but sometimes its scary, and right now my chest hurts so bad with anxiety that its scary to feel anything. Not that I don't want to feel, I'd just rather not feel this anxiety.

[Ann]

I need some positive words of encouragement. I am really having a hard time. Student teaching is really taking it out of me. One of my friends would say "Life is tough get over it" and I feel guilty for letting it affect me so much, when I have so much more going for me than some do. I'm feeling really selfish and not worthy of anything right now. I need help, to climb out of my crater, I don't want to dig down, I want to climb up and out.
Sorry for being such a downer.

[wendy]

Good morning Anne...I want to offer you some encouragement...I am sorry your friend would tell you just to get over it! When my friends student taught they all felt stressed. They felt like a lot was on the line, wanted to do their best, were nervous about their evaluations, and felt like their whole future depended on how well they did. On top of that some of them were dealing with young people for the first time and to say the least with the student's parents. I would encourage you to first to quit judging yourself as bad for feeling some stress and then do some things to take care of yourself during this time. I don't think feeling some stress during this time or sharing that you feel it is selfish. I think it's healthy you acknowledge it. I understand the feeling of being in a crater and wanting to climb up and out...I had an uncle who was working on a gas line in a pit and there was an explosion. He was litereally moved in a circle in the pit until it was over...sometimes I feel like I get stuck and I am being blown like that. Ann you have gotten this far in your schooling and recovery and I believe you can do it and keep recovering. I do understand it is hard, so keep sharing here. I think the stress is normal. What can you do to destress at the end of each day?

Every year when we start up our support groups I feel really stressed and used to feel guilty and shamed myself saying I shouldn't feel that way or if I were healthier I would be stressed, or if I were a more mature person I would handle it better...now I tell myself that it's normal to feel stress when we put together groups of women from all walks of life who are hurting and struggling and who have all sorts of defense mechanims...now I take it easy in other parts of my life when we start up. For example at the beginning of the year I don't do my usual writing, or baby sitting the grandkids on meeting days, make dinner on meeting nights simpler, etc. I have noticed when I don't feel guilty and shame myself the stess level itself goes down quite a bit and then as the year progresses its only there when we have a problem to solve. Hang in there and know I don't view you as a downer!!!!!!

[Ann]

Thanks Wendy!! I really appreciate the encouragement!!