Why She Feels Fat by Johanna Marie McShane

Great thoughts, Laura. And you are clearly doing terrific work in your recovery. Here's a thought to add in, if you want to.

Sam, you're totally right, and that's the kicker, isn't it? Someone who suffers from an eating disorder often can't see beyond that very moment of, how will he/she feel if she eats that, how feel she feel if she purges... it's so hard for her to imagine what kinds of freedom are available to her.

Couple of years ago I heard a woman interviewed about her upcoming book. I don't remember the name of the book or specific details about its content, but one thing she said struck me and has stayed with me since. She said that "freedom requires discipline."

Someone asked me how to know if a relationship was healthy. It's a great question, and one whose answer can fill a bunch of pages of a book.

I wanted to congratulate you, RunforJoy, on your project of experimenting with taking risks. I know it's hard work and can be nerve-wracking. 

There is such a major disconnect between some of the things people who suffer from eating disorders think and reality. That's not a surprise to anyone, but periodically someone says something that reminds me how big the discrepancy can be.

Wendy, I bet it's not lost on you that you've got some of that perfectionistic, black and white thinking thing going on about your grief group. Maybe we can get it to mellow out a bit, which would make it easier to get your mind and psyche around, and then less difficult to change.

One of the concepts people who suffer from eating disorders have lots of complaints about is "softness."

I was talking about fish bowls today at work. It occurred to me how easy it is to be fooled or misled by how someone's (even our own) fish bowl appears.

Before I went away, Super Egg asked this question in response to my fish bowl image post: "...one of many rules in my fish bowl was a certain way of being tough emotionally and even physically. as i start to observe other fish bowls i notice that they don't seem as rigid. but what is the correct level of toughness? for example i had a panic attack not long ago with my t. even though my expereince was very safe and a soft place to fall, i am still beating myself up about it. how do we know that we are being tough enough? i realize there must be a place in the middle but what is it? and how do i know what fish bowl is telling me the right answer?"