Narrative about Ed

Recently, I received an interesting email from Lindsay Gooze, who is a student at UCSD. She was assigned to write a narrative about a book and chose Life Without Ed. I am so honored that she chose my book as her inspiration that I wanted to share her story with you below.

Thanks, Lindsay! You are very creative and a great writer.

Best,

Jenni

Lindsay's Narrative

Jenni sobs and hysterically pounds on the door of her mother’s house.  She staggers into the house as her mom opens the door.  “Can I stay here tonight?” she manages through her tears. “Ed and I had a big fight.” 

Jenni has bruises on her neck, she is dressed in baggy clothes, and her tired face looks worn beyond her years.  Her mom is concerned but frustrated, since she has heard this story many times before.  Like many other women in abusive relationships, Jenni has tried to end it on several occasions.  But she remains trapped, despite the constant warning from her family and friends to get out of it before it is too late.

They are worried that staying with Ed could cost Jenni her life.  Jenni’s physical and emotional health has already disintegrated.

She is a remnant of the person she used to be.  She was captain of her high school volleyball team, a straight A-student, and a loyal friend.  Jenni has isolated herself from the people and activities she once loved, ever since Ed came into her life.  Long gone is the boisterous, happy-go-lucky Jenni who sung out loud to the radio with her friends and told jokes at the family dinner table.  

Now Jenni’s every action is controlled by Ed, who acts like her personal drill sergeant by giving her orders and berating her for not performing to his liking in all aspects of her life.  Sometimes Jenni hatred for Ed burns with an undeniable passion, but it pales in comparison to her self-hatred for staying with him for so long.  The tragedy is not just in Ed’s abuse of Jenni, but also in Jenni’s faithful “love” for Ed.  Jenni cannot picture herself living without Ed because she would not know what to do without his direction.  She feels safe in his arms, and the thought of her unknown life without him leaves her frozen.  After all Ed and Jenni have had some good times, his rigid regulations and strict authority once helped Jenni achieve some great things, and for a while, she even liked the person she was becoming.

Now she does not know she who she is anymore.  She looks in the mirror and sees a shell of her former self.  Her insides are empty, even though Ed promised to make them full.

Her mom cradles Jenni in her arms.  Both mother and daughter know that Jenni has to break up with Ed once and for all. “I’m done with my E.D.” Jenni abbreviates his name because it is too painful to say.  “I have to break up with my eating disorder,” Jenni says as she calls Ed out for who he really is.

Comments

[Cassie Kobrin]

Lindsay, this is amazing! You are inspiring and a truly gifted writer! You should make this into a movie.

[Nettie]

What a fabulous narrative! Thanks for sharing this version of the struggle we all through. Bravo Lindsay. Hoping the project got you an A+.