Last night, I attended an Election Day party at my friend’s house. Some people there were Democrats, some Republicans, and some neither. Even though we had our differences, one thing was for sure: We were all together witnessing an event that will go down in the history books. If I ever decide to have kids, the 2008 Presidential Election will be something that I will tell them about. Thanks to being recovered, I will be able to talk about the event in an authentic, real way.
Sadly, I can’t remember much about other historical events that I have lived through. I was so sick with my eating disorder that I was not truly present in this world. I was trapped inside of my head with all of my troubles (real and make-believe) and my eating disorder. I do not remember many specifics during that time, because my brain was not functioning properly. To me, it feels like my eating disorder erased entire sections of my life from my mind. But not anymore!
I am truly alive today on November 5, 2008. Are you?
Best,
Jenni
I really like the sentiment behind this post. I have years of my life wherein I "missed" or was just not present for. I was too worried about the food being served at the party, purging, my appearance, or others' impressions of me to really enjoy and make memories.
The memories I have of my 11 year struggle are ones that are so vivid - because the event got me out of my head and into the world to enjoy.
Posted by: Bethany | November 05, 2008 at 04:09 PM
Thanks for this post. I agree with you in that after being 'recovered' for about 7 months now, I find it difficult to look back at the past four years of my life and really remember in detail just 'being.'
That sense of appreciating and acknowledging the different phases of my life from moving to college and away from home to traveling all seem so faint in my memory.
Posted by: mysteriousdream | November 06, 2008 at 02:33 AM
Thankyou for this post Jenni,
It really made me think about my eating disorder and how much i will miss out on if i keep on living with this monster.
i have to try my best at recovery and thanks to you Jenni i realli feel motivated by these special words you speak.
thankyou
Posted by: Emma | November 30, 2008 at 04:25 PM