In our local newspaper there is a column occasionally written by Carolyn Hax called Dear Carolyn--she writes for the Washington Post so I'm guessing her column is syndicated. On September 18th a letter appeared from a woman asking for relationship advice. Tom pointed it out to me as he thought the response was a good one. I agree.
The reader's letter begins, "I am in a committed, three-year relationship with a great man. He has the genetic disposition to become overweight if he doesn't watch what he eats." This woman goes on to talk about how she's let him know that she's not attracted to fat people. She describes how her eating is more "disciplined" (my word) than his and that his family "celebrate[s] food." Her question is "Is it rude, mean, controlling, to tell your significant other to please keep your appearance for the sake of the relationship?"
Duh!
Carolyn's response was a bit more civil than mine. She tells her that she needs to make a choice on "whether [she] can love him for who he is, knowing it may (or may not) affect his weight; or whether [she] can love him only if he behaves more like [her]."
Carolyn's final comment says it all: "If it's the latter, then I would suggest finding someone more like you, and freeing him to find someone who loves him as-is."
We ALL deserve to be loved AS IS!!
Blessings until next time,
Doris
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