Advice for Parents

The dance of mothering

Please forgive my extended silence. We've had multiple projects going on at our home and then last week I came down with an ugly bronchitis and fever. I am amazed at how weak I feel and the amount of sleep I've needed over the last few days. I've had a blog mulling in my mind for days now so am going to try to actually get it down in writing before I must return to bed once more.

The following thoughts were prompted by a conversation I had a few weeks ago with a dear friend. She asked me, "When do we ever stop mothering our children?" I think my answer was "I don't know if we do."

Anniversaries

Tomorrow my husband Tom celebrates his 58th birthday. Tomorrow is also the tenth anniversary of our 19-year-old daughter's death due to bulimia. The fact that these two "anniversaries" land on the same day has always made June 16th bittersweet...while we celebrate Tom's birth we must also honor and recognize Andrea's death.

The important work we all need to be doing

A couple of recent articles have created quite a stir in the eating disorder/Health at Every Size/Intuitive Eating communities.  One is from a May 16, 2009 article written by Hortense at Jezebel in response to the April/May issue of Girl’s Life Magazine and the other is a May 24, 2009 Interview with MeMe Roth by Gaby Wood printed in the Guardian.

Please join me in lessening the disparity

I belong to a number of Internet professional organizations and so receive updates on what's being done out in the "bigger" world regarding focusing on wellness versus weight. Just when I think things are getting better I am reminded that that is not the case. In an "Intuitive Eating Professionals Discussion" chain there was a comment posted 3 days ago from Deborah Kauffmann a Registered Dietician in Baltimore, MD:

Heed the warning ...

Last week I had the privilege and the honor of presenting to a room full of families and their "in treatment" loved ones at the amazing eating disorder treatment facility, Avalon Hills in Logan, Utah. Besides being thoroughly impressed with what Avalon provides their clients I was humbled by the ...

The Journey of self-acceptance is best when taken with others

OK...I know I continually return to the resource I've written about a few times already, but it really is that good. In Off the C.U.F.F.: A Parent Skills Book for the Management of Disordered Eating Dr. Nancy Zucker has so many practical suggestions for how we as parents can navigate the so often tumultuous terrain of our child's eating disorder that, I believe, it is worth the blog time I'm giving it.

Signs of our times

Yesterday, we had a bit of excitement in Napa. The local college, where my husband Tom is a professor, experienced an emergency lock down. Students and teachers were not allowed to leave their classrooms from about 2 PM to about 5:30 PM because two armed "bank" robbers chose to hide out in the campus library.  The stress of the situation was not helped by the fact that yesterday was the anniversary of the Columbine shootings.

Self care

A few weeks ago I wrote about my renewed commitment to spend time every day taking care of me. Except for a few slip ups, I've been excited with how consistently I've honored this pledge to myself.  What has amazed me is that even though I am taking time out of each day to pamper me (either with a soak in the hot tub, an extended bit of meditation, reading a good book, a meal prepared just for me--eaten with complete presence and gratitude, or a walk in nature) all those pressing jobs in my life are still being accomplished. I am seriously astonished. How is my work getting done without me spending every waking moment attempting to complete each task?

Updates on the "Health At Every Size" Movement

I'd planned on writing a different blog today but before beginning I checked my email.  I received such an exciting update from Linda Bacon that I just had to share major portions of it with you today. If you have yet to read Linda's amazing book, Health at Every Size: The Surprising Truth About Your Weight, please find a way to do so...it will change your life!  This is information ALL parents need. In Linda's email she shared:

How could you ... why did you ...

I received an email last weekend via the IAEDP listserve.  It was from a psychologist I did not know. Her very brief message included a link to an article written by Geneen Roth. I must admit that I ignored it at first glance. Although in the past I'd always been impressed with Ms. Roth's writing this positive impression was replaced with disillusionment ...