Am I too old to attempt recovery?

Question: Am I too old to attempt recovery?

Answer:  No. Never. Period. Full Stop.

When years of shame becomes decades, it can seem insurmountable make that first step towards recovery.  Those little lies you tell yourself to get through the day are now the lies that have kept you confined in an eating disorder longer than even you'd imagined possible.  You grapple with the desire to live a life free of disordered eating and the fear of giving up your fractured way of existing wins over.  For inexplicable reasons, you have fights with those that would help you.  And each day, you go round and round, thoughts spinning faster and the music on this haunted ride keeps getting louder drowning out all sensibilities.

Admittedly, getting off that merry-go-round and presenting for treatment can be anxiety provoking. But You can do it!  Staying off will require courage, fortitude and a strong support system.

The next question generally seems to be: Will I recover after being ill so long?  Nothing is promised to anyone, I can only be certain that if you don't attempt recovery you will stay ill.   

But how?  I would recommend starting with your primary care physician to get a medical checkup.  Be specific and say that you have an eating disorder.  If you feel you cannot say this, then write it down, or take someone with you who can help you. Depending on illness manifestations, your heart, bones, electrolytes, and blood counts will need to be evaluated.  Do not fight the process.

Then locate a psychiatrist, nutritionist and therapist.  Try calling The National Eating Disorder Association's Helpline :

Live Helpline Hours (1-800-931-2237): Monday - Friday: 8:30am - 4:30pm Pacific 

NEDA also offers online referrals.

There are many other referral databases available on the internet, and this is only one example.  In searching for a therapist, It would be prudent to ask for someone who has worked with a patient who is not in their teens, and has varied issues.  Ask for their hours of availability, philosophy, training, affiliations with treatment center, cost/insurance information, views on recovery and success rate.

Arm yourself with literature such as Trisha Gura's Lying in Weight:  The Hidden Epidemic of Eating Disorders in Adult Women.

Unlike other recovery from alcohol or other drugs of abuse, abstinence from food is not an option.  Learning to have what was abused/feared on a daily basis is now the challenge.  You must take comfort in knowing that it has been done.  Others have gone before you and succeeded.  You too can triumph.  The hardest part is making the attempt.

Comments

[Jenni Schaefer [AUTHOR]]

I love what you are doing! Thanks for sharing your words with us.

Jenni

[nicola]

im 32 and have an e. d for 15-16 years i so fear that i will never be able to recover from this illness, and this stress instead of motivating me forward has led me to overanxiety and fear constantly, cant relax, even fear food, and whats the right thing to eat and the wrong thing..so much contradiction about food that is good and not so good...everyday bombarded with wheat is bad, gluten, bad, too much fruit, dairy are we intolerant ...wow it bombarding, and confusing...

[Leslie Murray]

It sounds as if youre having a tough time, Nicola.  I hope that you are seeking help for your eating disorder.  If you havent yet, please seek a treatment team that includes a nutritionist, physician, and therapist.  It is important to remember that it doesnt matter how long you have had your illness, recovery is always possible.  Self shame hinders this process.  I wish you well.