About Karen

  • About Karen R. Koenig

    Karen R. Koenig, LCSW, M.Ed., an expert in the psychology of eating, is a psychotherapist, educator, motivational speaker, and author with nearly 30 years of experience helping chronic dieters and compulsive/emotional/restrictive eaters become “normal” eaters... Read More

    Books by Karen R. Koenig

    Doris

    Nice Girls Finish Fat
    Put Yourself First and Change Your Eating Forever

    Author: Karen R. Koenig, LCSW, M.Ed.
    254 pages (paperback)
    order online at www.bulimia.com

    The first book to explain the link between overdoing and overeating, psychotherapist Karen R. Koenig gives women detailed advice on how to lose their extra baggage – both emotional and physical – by taking better care of themselves... Read More


    Doris

    What Every Therapist Needs to Know about Treating Food and Weight Issues
    Author: Karen R. Koenig, LCSW, M.Ed.
    240 pages (paperback)
    order online at www.bulimia.com

    Packed with insights and practical tips, this unique book teaches clinicians how to help clients make peace with food and the scale and balance nutrition and exercise inn a healthy lifestyle... Read More


    Doris

    Food and Feelings Workbook
    Author: Karen R. Koenig, LCSW, M.Ed.
    216 pages (paperback)
    order online at www.bulimia.com

    In this dynamic workbook, Koenig interweaves lighthearted discussion with mindful, reflective exercises to show readers how to identify, experience, and learn from these feelings instead burying them in food-related behaviors... Read More


    Rules of "Normal" Eating

    Rules of "Normal" Eating
    Author: Karen R. Koenig, LCSW,M.Ed.
    240 pages (paperback)
    order online at www.bulimia.com

    Koenig lays out the four basic rules that "normal" eaters follow instinctively, along with specific skills and techniques that help promote change and point the way toward genuine physical and emotional fulfillment... Read More

« Ending Food and Body Abuse | Main | Acknowledging Feelings »

March 06, 2008

Stop Focusing on Food

You know the old question: Do you live to eat or eat to live? Well, no surprise which attitude is held by “normal” eaters. If you’re highly food centered—even as a restrictive eater, controlling your intake while obsessing about it—it’s difficult to develop a positive relationship with food. The goal is to enjoy it, without food itself or thoughts of it becoming the focus of your life.

Naturally, most people have favorite foods and restaurants—the Chicken Kiev at the new place in town, the crusty, whole wheat bread at the café down the street, the caramel fudge at the candy store at the mall, or the super creamy cheesecake at the bakery. We all have different cravings and special foods that satisfy them. Enjoying delicious food can be a real treat and enormously satisfying and memorable. Although food originally tasted good so that we’d eat it to survive, over the millennia, taste has been enhanced so that food meeting taste buds is now an event in itself.


The problem arises when you’re so focused on food that your life revolves around it. Heading for dinner with an acquaintance, you’re less excited about possibly making a new friend, than about the Tiramisu you already know you have to have for dessert. Or you’re meeting an old chum who’s in town for the day at your favorite brunch spot, and find yourself thinking more about the waffles in syrup than how wonderful it will be catching up with her. If your brain lights up occasionally thinking about certain foods, that’s healthy. If you find that every day you’re looking forward to food more than what seems natural, you need to reprogram your brain.


There’s a fine line between enjoying and anticipating food pleasurably, and putting your energy into it 24/7. Most “normal” eaters could tell you their favorite foods, but don’t think much about them. If obsessing about food or overdoing to get it is something you do regularly—Gee, honey, let’s go to Target, though it’s hailing like crazy out there, cause I seem to recall that the diner next door has those out-of-this-world fries—it may mean that there aren’t enough other things in life to ring your chimes.


Over-focusing on food is often symptomatic of boredom, routine, and a kind of ennui. So, when you feel your mind drifting toward food when you’re not hungry, remind yourself that it should not be the center of the universe. It has a wonderful place in life, but should not become your life. Instead of obsessing about eating, reflect on other ways to bring passion to your little world, then go out and make it happen.


Best,

Karen

Normal Eating web site

Normal Eating talks and workshops

PLEASE NOTE: I encourage you to comment on my blogs and will do my best to address topics/questions you raise in future blogs. I cannot provide individual responses, but encourage you to post your questions and comments on The Food and Feelings Workbook message board at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/foodandfeelings.

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